A weeks long test of strength and motivation

Maintaining the motivation to continue on this MD/PhD path isn't something I regularly struggle with. EVER. But over the past ~ 2 weeks where I was ironically on vacation, I had some SERIOUS doubts. Why? In reflecting over my summer research experience and a couple others, I became a combo of p**sed off AND exasperated, thinking that this was yet another case of the same $hit, different day! However like I always eventually do, I shake off the BS and keep it moving!!!

Moving on, I've also had to contemplate the best bioinformatics flavored prospective job I've ever seen in my entire career, it kinda came out if no where. At this point, nothing is official/in writing as of yet and I get a headache thinking about what I'm going to do if I am offered the gig. It's virtual requiring a few trips to the East coast for meetings every now and then, with a little international travel thrown in there for good measure. And given that I'm still looking for a comfortable home for my research interests, I'm taking this as a sign that maybe a low six figure salary is what's needed right now. At least that's what my savings account is screaming, lol!!!

Other happenings right now are that I spend what feels like an obscene amount of time at my daughter's university, as in I feel like the proverbial "helicopter Mom" because of it, lol!! No, I'm definitely NOT spying on her or just checking up to make sure she's staying on top of her classes. It's simply that it's cheaper for me to park at her school and take the metro to my school than vice versa. But I can admit that I DO worry about her being accousted on/around the metro by some if the nastiest homeless people I've EVER seen in my life and by nasty, I mean attitude wise. And I'd really hate to open a can of "whoop a$$" on my way to school on one of 'em, so I choose to park and deal with the nasty folks instead. However, given that we are now both adults and in school, we are having problems delineating between what I'm supposed to buy and what she needs to be responsible for given her free education. So as an example, $100 plus Nike tennis shoes? "Yo' money, baby". Under Armour sports clothes? "Yo' money baby". Online access to chemistry book? "My money this time, but yo' money for everything else. But hey that's what full rides to college are for, and since I'm a student too, contributing "yo" part is even more important, lol!! I'm just thankful and blessed that she has the means to cover everything she needs with money left to spare and save!!

These days I'm also going full steam ahead with my verbal review for the MCAT and so far so good!!! I'm scoring around "10" on the old format though I'd probably better look at the new stuff in depth soon to see if there are any significant differences. As for my classes, they're going very well, I'm taking an informatics course which is a$$ kickin' and one in translational science as well. For now, I've decided to stay put department wise, but in the next few months I'll be earnestly looking into the department I'm thinking of transferring too. Much of the cause of my hesitation about moving stems from another adage from my grandmother, "better a dog you know than one you don't" and the fact that the Doc I shadow is in my current department and has always had my back. So we'll see how this goes over the next few months.

Lastly, I want to "shout out" my readers for the comments and emails, I certainly need the reminders to stay focused! Speaking if focused, I listen to this song by Mack Wilds almost every day to get my mind right before studying: